Phantom Sway

OJ Wants to Date Kris Jenner…or Caitlyn

The Juice Wants a Jenner, America wants a bleach bath

Everyone loves a good romance – a story of star-crossed lovers overcoming obstacles, distance and the petty interference of meddling family and friends to find true and lasting love. Romeo and Juliet, Liz and Dick, Justin Bieber and Selena Gomez – all the great loves of history move us to desire our own everlasting soulmates.

Well steady yourselves for what might take the crown as the new Romance of the Century because this could be big. Glove model and Cuba Gooding, Jr. impersonator O.J. Simpson is saying he wants to date Kris Jenner when he is finally paroled from prison (probably some time next year).

 

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That sound you just heard was Kris Jenner’s bank account exploding. Ryan Seacrest is probably already hiring “friends” to co-star on “Kris and O.J. semicolon I Love You To Death.” According to the Sun, some dude is making a documentary about O.J. and claims the ex-football star told him he’s always had a krush on Kris and can’t wait to get out of prison so he can sweep her off her feet.

But wait…there’s more! If Kris won’t bite, O.J. has apparently said he would consider dating Caitlyn Jenner as well.

“OJ is obsessed with Caitlyn. He is struck by how she has captured the hearts of the world and said with a straight face, ‘When I get out of here I would consider dating her too’.”

Ian revealed: “OJ definitely has a plan when he gets out of prison and he intends to be around the Kardashians.

“He is going to pitch to them about getting a spot on the show. He is broke, he needs money and he feels his only chance to get back on TV — which is his dream — is to hook up with his old ‘family’.”

 

I got nuthin’. RIP America. We had a good run.

#SMOD2016

Phantom Sway

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