Tom Hanks Set to Play Gene Siskel and Roger Ebert in Upcoming Film

Paramont pictures announced Monday that Academy Award winning actor Tom Hanks will be portraying both Chicago Tribune and CBS Television film critic Gene Siskel as well as his long time television partner, Pulitzer Prize winning Chicago Sun-Times film critic Roger Ebert in an upcoming film.

Associate assistant of production Dolly Cashen explained how this would be done.  “Tom will gain weight on a diet of donuts and bacon to play the portly Ebert.  Then production will be suspended for six months while he slims down on a diet of shredded wheat and Metamucil to play Siskel.  He’s such a dedicated actor.  We’re expecting another Oscar caliber performance…or two!”

Asked about the project Hanks said it was a great actors challenge.  ”Acting with yourself is one thing, but playing two such unique individuals adds even more.  One was thin and the other was fat.  One had hair, the other didn’t.  There’s so much to explore there.”

Pressed further Hanks admitted, “They both gave me a few thumbs down, but when it was the fat one it made me angrier.  I don’t know why.  Which one was he?”

Asked about the plot of the film, Cashen said, “It will be a unique story of two friends yet rivals, of a symbiotic relationship that benefited them both and us.  They influenced Hollywood and entertained millions.  I’ll know more when there’s a script.”

André Dupuy
Latest posts by André Dupuy (see all)